Sharks Don't Dance!

After months of hype, Connor's first formal school dance was upon us. Connor had been saying all year that he did not want to go and I always said, "Fine. You don't have to go." Every time the topic came up, he assured me that he did NOT want to go. Whenever I caught wind of other kids talking about the big night, Connor made sure to drag me aside and spit through his teeth that he did NOT want to go. Kids started shopping for dresses and ties and he said, "Mom, I REALLY do NOT want to go!!" Tickets were sold in the cafeteria at lunch every day, and every day he said, "Mom, I do NOT want to go." By the end of May, I said "I GET IT! YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO! " Then.... the night before the dance he said, "Mom, I think a bunch of my friends are actually going to that dance..." I started to say, "Well, Connor, maybe you..." I did not finish the sentence before he loudly interjected. ".. BUT I STILL DO NOT WANT TO GO!" Reaching my wits' end, I said, well then maybe you want to do something else?.... He said, "Yeah. I think I do." And the alternative dance event was born: Sharks Don't Dance! (The school mascot is a shark.) A handful of his friends thought it was a great idea and also skipped the dance in favor of taking on the "Man vs. Food Challenge" at a local hot spot and had a great time trying to down the 6.5 pound milkshake made famous by some cable food show. At first, they thought it looked easy and enthusiastically ordered TWO of the bohemoth shakes: cookie dough and straight chocolate.
Team Navy (Graeme, Kyle, Connor and Nathan) got right to work, but... Baseball Buds (Evan, Brandon and Logan) took an early lead. After Evan remembered he was lactose intolerant (c'mon man!), Logan attempted to single-handedly bury the flagging Team Navy competition. Everyone decided to call a time out. Brandon thought it might help his appetite to eat a few pickles! (Seriously ??!!@#$!?) Never ones to be beaten by a challenge, Connor and Nathan decided to take Team Navy to the finish line and Kyle helped wipe out the last few cookie dough chunks.
After all that, Connor and Nathan were feeling a little... SICK! All in all, everyone, said it was a BLAST, much more fun than the dance. Besides, they DID NOT want to go! We'll see what they say when their first high school Homecoming rolls around next fall!